It's only temporary!? Yeah whatever I wish it was that simple to have that mindset. Who are you to tell me it's only temporary when I am going through. When I see no way out and feel all hope is gone. When I have been dealing with this for days, months, even years. How can you tell me...after I have giving all I could this feeling is only temporary?
Man let me tell you. Life...no not life God has a way of just putting us in our place. I felt this way before. Ok so I love God, raised in a Christian household, for God I live, for God I will die... right?! That's what I'm supposed to say right?! But at one point in my life...the funk was so real I just didn't...couldn't see my way out. So, let me tell you how I felt.
So, I knew that God was the source of my help and strength, but I could not see past my pain nor hurt nor shoot whatever the heck it was because to this day I couldn't even tell you. I was pretty much existing, at least that is how I felt. I told a few people I really felt like the Israelites wandering around the wilderness looking for the land of milk and honey many never reached their destination. Alicia…you know all this stuff about the bible did you pray? Nope!!! I couldn't I literally could not even pray I was at a point in my life where I was just stuck. Did I want to pray yes of course, could I no.
So, you mean to tell me you had this awesome relationship with Christ, went to KAA, attending several conferences, attended regular bible study and church and you couldn't pray? No! stop asking me already :) Ya’ll I was living the quote on quote (yes, I wrote that out) good life. It really wasn't good only temporary happiness because when I got home...still empty feeling nothing...no literally nothing. I went to work, took care of the kid, worked out, slept, went out that night, slept some more and that was it. I did this for a while and if it really wasn't long it sure in the heck felt like it.
How did I get unstuck? hmmmm...nobody but God (seriously). As I was writing this post I was trying to come up with how to tell you how that's how I know it was only him. Supernatural healing I'm telling you. So earlier in this post I told you I knew where my help came from. Well I started running to the church house...bible study, prayer meeting, Sunday school, ministry meetings whatever I was beating down the walls of the church. So, is this when you started back praying? NO! *shrugs* I just knew this is where I needed to be I was still stuck for a while a long while, but God is a God that never lets his sheep stray too far too long and I am so thankful for that. I was still just there but I knew I needed to be there. I knew I was stuck, I knew I was just wandering through life, I knew I was depressed...I was very self-aware folks, but it just took time. Time to continue hearing positive things, time hearing the word of God. The way I was beating down the walls of the church God was beating down the walls of hurt, depression and pain in my life.
Girl how long did it take you to get this point? You wouldn't believe me if I told you. It was a long while, but it took time, patience and a push. A hard push. Like fall and get back up type of push. But God!!! Man, my God is so good he put people in my life to push me, encourage me, love on me and even be patient with me. I just hope you know that all things are possible through Christ. ALL THINGS let me say it again for the people in the back ALL THINGS now if my aunt were reading this she would tell me to add a scripture so check out Matthew 19:26 and that's for those in the back that has something to say LOL I am not a preacher, perfect or even a scripture quoter (yes I made that up) but I can tell you how good my God has been to me and if you think that's something he can do the same for you! Have you tried him? LOL
This is why I am so passionate about helping to encourage others going through a funk or thinking they aren't good enough, or even feeling like they can never accomplish their goal. I know it is not easy believe me again when I say I KNOW!!!!!!!!! It takes time, prayer and just a willingness to do it. Guess what that's still not enough don't think you can do it own your own. No ma'am, no sir it starts with God then surrounding yourself with positive "different" people not the same ones that you were stuck struggling with, and lastly you have to play your part too EMBRACE CHANGE (I could go on about that one, but we will save that for a different post). God knows I am not perfect and I am still developing personally everyday, but I will share everything I know to help YOU succeed and excel. So, with that being said...
You VIBE with Me, I VIBE with you, and we are going to VIBE together.